Unrequited Love
by onetreefan
Summary: The place the body and heart goes when they can't be with the one they most desire. EOC and eventual EO! common! Trust me guys. I won't let ya down!
1. Chapter 1

**A new story idea in my mind. Trust me, this will be EO, but it will be a while from now. Please trust me. It will happen, but the angst needs to happen first!!! Please read and review! I promise I haven't forgotten Threads. This is just another story I have thought of! Thanks all! Love ya. This first chapter is for Rach, Jess and Kinsey Jo who all chatted with me about this idea. Love ya all! Now read:D**

A date?

The words were like poison in his mind. The jealousy that burned his heart ran deep into his core. He remembered when she returned from her FBI cover-up. God, how he had missed her. He had taken advantage of what extreme dependency he had upon Olivia's daily existence in his life. Her light humming throughout the day kept his soul at ease. The way she retrieved both of their coffees in the morning would soothe his nocturnal headaches. 

Now she was drinking tea religiously. 

Now she was on a date. With a protester of sorts. A _Damian_. Who the hell names their child Damian? 

The more his mind returned to his forbidden love and her newest one night stand, the angrier Elliot got. He consumed the rest of his beer and was gazing at the blank television screen when a woman's voice came behind him. 

"Detective Stabler?" 

Elliot glanced at the female cop quickly and smirked while the bartender retrieved another beer. "Hello Officer Montero." 

The woman smirked and took the seat beside him. "Don't worry. Im not here to judge. In our line of work, we deserve a beer or three." 

Elena Montero had been a cop for the past nine years. Out of college with a BS in Criminology and moved her way from the California coast to New York City. She and Officer Jesse Kephart came from the same town and were a good team. Young officers that needed to be aquainted to the hustle and bustle of New York City and its darkness. Elena reminded Elliot a lot of himself when he first returned from the Marines. She was strong. She was daring. She was mysterious.

"So, Stabler. Not that I am trying to pry, but why are you alone this evening with Samuel Adams and his liquor keeping you company?" 

"Why go home when there is no one to turn to?" Elliot said lowly.

Elena sighed. She had always admired Detective Elliot Stabler. He was the first detective she met when she moved to New York. Elena admired his strength and his ability to control the officers in his troop. His strong body and face with those hypnotic baby blues made her melt. It shocked her when she learned he was divorced. _Who would leave this?_ she would often ask herself. Now that she and her best friend, Jesse, were working at the 1-6, she would often catch herself studying the amazing man beside her. 

Elena consumed the rest of her beer and saw that Elliot wasn't finding comfort in the alcohol. "Come here," she whispered. 

Elliot gave her a confused look and she laughed at the beginnings of a haze on the detective's eyes. "Huh?" he asked.

"Trust me, Detective. You are safe with me." 

Out of his nature, Elliot took the young officer's hand and allowed her to lead him to the streets of New York. 

Elena had led him to a sacred area in Central Park. Jesse had wanted to evaluate apartments that would allow dogs and she needed a few moments to grasp the transition from leaving California to New York. She had found the abandoned Mary statue that was surrounded by pink roses and she immediately genuflected before the sacred statue. Elliot followed her lead and she released his hand. It would be his choice to leave. His choice to stay. 

"I found this area when I first came her. Other than Jesse, I didn't know anyone. I was lost. I had wandered and found this place. It gives me hope and peace. Not simply within myself, but in humanity. As an officer for New York City, I need to keep a rational mind. Without this area for me to find my bearings, I would surely be lost." 

Elena turned around and met the now sober appearance of the rough detective. "Elliot, there are many ways the heart can go in order for it to heal. Don't allow your heart to build a fortress from mankind and God. Allow love to filter through." 

Love. Elliot reserved that part of his heart to his Olivia. But she couldn't be his. Not now anyway. She was with Duncan... no _Damian._

It was in his frustration that he genuinely admired Elena Montero's beauty. Her ash blonde hair appeared darker in the moonlight. She clung to her jean jacket in the darkness and he admired her defined curves and her warm sun kissed face. He watched as she took a moment to pray before the statue and began to turn away from him and the blessed mother. 

She walked toward civilization but he grabbed her arm in stopping her. "Elena?" 

She turned and met his eyes. 

"I don't want to be alone. Not tonight." 

Elena had heard this tone before. She was the "best friend". Often guys clung to her when they were in heart ache or simply needing to get laid. She witnessed the familiar pain and angst that flashed before the blue eyed detective and she nodded in agreement. "Not here," she whispered. 

Elliot linked their fingers together and led her toward his apartment... the one that reminded him so much of Olivia Benson. 

Neither remembered how long it took for them to arrive at his apartment. Neither remembered whose shirt was ripped off first. Elena didn't remember calling Jesse to say that she wouldn't be coming to the apartment that night. Elliot couldn't recall what he felt when he kissed the warm skin of her breasts. Elena gave herself to him as an instrument of need and release. To never have experienced pure love, she was willing to sacrifice her body for his need to find comfort in the friction of skin. 

Elliot used her for the touch of a woman. Her lips worked magic on his skin and she skillfully removed him of his briefs. 

He laid her down beneath him and her naked body laid open and ready beneath him. Elliot admired how her honey eyes morphed to a vibrant green before him. He was ready as he marked the column of her neck. His mouth moved to her ear and he whispered, "Casual, right?" 

She smirked and pulled him inside her as they both moaned in shock and pleasant and warm pleasure. "Yeah," she moaned. "Casual is good." 

As they rolled together, both knew this wouldn't be the only night they would find comfort in another's arms. It was the curse of those who suffer from unrequited love. They turn to substitutions for the comfort of a lover. They will only be truly complete when they find the one they are meant for. 

Oh what a twist filled road a night of need and lust began for these two officers...

**Now I need to know if you want more! This will be EO... but Elena and Jesse need to be chatted up a bit! Please Review guys! love ya all!**


	2. Chapter 2

Elena watched as his heart returned to a normal pace and she rolled out of his bed. She wasn't one who was held after a night of sex. She and Elliot had been doing this for about six months now. She would see him broken, jealous or angry and she knew he would need her that night. She sighed and turned away to find her clothes that were scattered on the ground. 

Elliot looked at the woman beside him. She was still full of life and mystery. He knew what he was doing wasn't right by any means. Elena was a substitution for Olivia. But he couldn't get enough. 

_ Elliot strolled into the 1-6 after a rough and wild night with Officer Montero. He saw her as she walked into the precinct and he knew she would remain professional. _

He thought he was being good about remaining normal until Munch spoke up. "Gee Fin. It seems that Stabler got laid!" 

Elliot froze as he got a cup of coffee. Olivia was laughing in her chair and Fin smirked. "What are you talking about fool?" 

"Stabler hasn't been this relaxed coming to this precinct in God knows how long. My guess is that he got laid." 

"Maybe I got a good nights sleep. Ever consider that?" Elliot said making his way to his desk with a smile on his face.

Fin and Munch looked at each other quickly and replied in unison, "No." 

Elliot laughed as the two detectives ventured on a case. Olivia and her warmth moved to the edge of his desk and smiled as Elliot worked on his paperwork. "What gives, El?" she asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You are a little happier this morning. Is there anyone I should know about?" Olivia said with a hint of jealousy in her tone. 

Elliot smiled in a brief content knowing she was jealous. He was about to reply when her phone rang. "Hold that thought," she said as she moved to her desk. "Benson. Oh hey there," she said lowly. He knew it was Damian. Damn it, he thought to himself. "I had a really good night... Oh shut up..." she laughed and it tore at his heart. 

Instead of listening to the vomit creating conversation, he stood up and felt a familiar tension in his body that was only present when he was angry or jealous. He had moved to the doors when he saw Elena from the corner of his eye with Officer Kephart. He moved to them and quickly stated, "Officer Montero. I need you for some more information on a crime scene." The perfect cover, he thought to himself. 

"Sure," she replied. She looked at Jesse and said, "Get me if the Davidson family calls again. We need their statements for Novak. I want them to be as comfortable as possible." 

"Just shut it E," Jesse said with a smile. "They like me more than you," he said with a humored tone. "Plus Im hotter." 

"Whatever," she whispered as she followed the tense detective. They had turned the corner and she spoke, "El--" 

She never finished her thought as his lips were instantly on hers. She moaned and pulled their bodies closer as she tried to soothe his tension and anger. "Not here," she whispered separating herself.

"Tonight?" he asked. "My place." 

She nodded as he moved away from her. She fixed her hair and makeup quickly in the bathroom before Jesse could notice the smudges around her mouth. 

Elliot turned the corner and watched Olivia with a disapproving face. "Liv.." 

"Officer Montero, huh?" she spat filled with anger and jealousy.

"Don't speak so loud. It was one night." 

"For what, El? For an easy lay?" 

"I didn't want to be alone!" Elliot growled and met her eyes. "And who are you to judge? Its not like Dennis is going to be your forever man is he?" 

"Its Damian, Elliot," Olivia growled. 

"Whatever!" he said as he moved passed Olivia and waited for Don's instructions. He was going to need to release his anger and jealousy soon. Thank God for Elena Montero, he thought to himself. 

For six months this had been their pattern. Either it was due to a bad case or Elliot's jealousy was mightier than usual, he turned to Elena for the friction of souls. They weren't talking lovers. No, she was his comfort. He didn't need to speak. He would release. He would ease. He would de-stress. That was enough for him. It was enough for her... until now.

Elliot had noticed the spark was missing in Elena's eyes tonight. A rich and fire filled pain filled her eyes and he watched as she masked her tears. He turned to his side and watched her dress. He admired her curved body but saw the pain-laced strain in her back. "Elena?" he whispered huskily in the darkness.

"Hmm..." was her reply as she found her bra under his bed.

"What's wrong?" he asked as her movements became more deliberate. 

"Nothing, Stabler. I just need to go." 

"Where? Wasn't Kephart talking about going on a date with someone tonight. You can stay." Elliot said trying to break through her armor.

"That would be a bad idea, Elliot," she whispered as she wiped away a tear. "You have been working a tough case for Cragen. You need to rest." 

"What about you?" he asked as she moved around.

"What about me?" she asked not knowing where he was headed. _Damn it, where is my shirt?_ she thought to herself. 

"You are still such a mystery to me," he whispered. "There was something in your eyes that seemed broken. You can talk to me." 

"That would be a mistake," she whispered. 

"Why?" he asked. 

"Stabler, when did this become about emotions and feelings?" she asked. Diversion. She was beginning to turn to her natural defense mechanisms. She couldn't--wouldn't allow him to see her heart and how each time he used her it broke a larger part of her soul. 

"Well, Montero," Elliot replied in a mocking tone, "I come to you when I am angry or I am hurting and you give yourself to me no questions asked. I want to know why." 

Elena sighed and finally met the eyes of her lover. "Elliot," she whispered moving to the edge of the bed. She found her shirt and began to button it up slowly. "I am the friend who one turns to when they are hurting or lost. Once they find their way they venture off without me. Im okay with it. You are healing, Elliot. I am here to be your friend and bring you a renewed sense of confidence and ability. You are a strong and beautiful man, Elliot. That is why I am here." 

"You never ask for anything. I barely know you. What are you afraid of?" 

_ That when you realize that I am madly in love with you, you will run faster than I can say no._ "I am not afraid of anything," Elena replied defensively.

"Bull shit," Elliot replied sitting up and moving her hair to the side. He kissed up her warm neck and sighed when he was met with the saltiness of tears. "Elena, you are kind and beautiful. When the right man comes he will love you forever." 

Knowing he wasn't speaking for himself broke her heart. Instead of breaking in front of him, she stood up and moved to her purse. "Get some sleep. Cragen will kick your ass if you don't get some sleep." 

Elliot smirked and fell back down into the pillows. "Goodnight, Elena," he whispered as he closed his eyes as his heart found comfort in sleep. He returned to his true love, Olivia, in his sleep. 

Elena had entered hers and Jesse's apartment quickly and smiled when Zac, their police dog, greeted her at the door. "Hey baby," she whispered feeding it quickly. As he ate, Elena moved to the fridge and took out the orange juice. For some reason, she couldn't get enough of it. 

"He wouldn't release his guard until you got here," Jesse said from the kitchen doorway.

Elena smiled and turned to her best friend who had found comfort in his Hane's boxers. She smirked and said, "Hey, where is Leanne?" 

"She was a flake. I ditched her about three hours ago and hung out with Zac." 

"That is really sad," Elena said with a sad smile. "What? Was she not up to par with your intelligence?" she asked in a mocking tone.

_No, Im only in love with you, _Jesse thought to himself. "No, but if I have to hear about another twist on General Hospital, I will happily shoot someone." 

Elena laughed a real laugh and Jesse smiled knowing that he could do that for her. He moved beside her and noticed the tear tracks on her cheeks. He sighed and looked out toward their dog that had claimed their couch. "How is Stabler?" he sighed.

"Jesse..." 

"Does he treat you well?" he asked.

"He barely knows me," she whispered. "I'd like to keep it that way." 

"Why don't you want to let anyone in?" Jesse sighed. "You will end up alone if I get married!" 

"That is a large _If,_" Elena said with a playful smirk. When she noticed that he wouldn't budge, she sighed and moved beside him. "Jesse, men don't love women like me. There are two types of women. The type men want and the type men can have. I am type B." 

"That is not true," Jesse said drinking some orange juice.

"Jesse, once Elliot's heart is healed, he will leave like every other guy..." 

"And you will end up hurt again and I will pick up the pieces!" Jesse growled.

Elena stopped and looked at her best friend with angry eyes. "What the hell does that mean?" she asked.

"Nothing," he growled. "Im going back to bed. Cragen will call us if he needs us to canvas tonight." 

"Jesse..." 

"Goodnight, Elena," he whispered roughly as he slammed the door from her. He sighed and leaned back against the door and he was amazing at how she still couldn't see that he was in love with her. 

Elena sighed and Zac looked at her from the couch. "What are you looking at?" she asked in a bitter tone.

Zac barked and returned to his venture for sleep.

Elena sighed and moved to Jesse's door. She knocked softly. "Jess? Jesse, Im sorry, okay?" She hated it when they fought. He was her best friend. She couldn't lose him. Giving up on the prospect for reconciliation tonight, she surrendered and whispered, "Just get a good night's sleep, okay?" 

Without a reply, she moved to her doorway. As she was about to close her door she heard a muffled, "Night, Punk." 

She smiled and called out, "Night brat." She then closed her door and moved to her empty bed to try and attempt to remove Elliot from her haunted mind and broken heart. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you guys for your reviews! Enjoy chapter three!**

Elliot entered the precinct after getting called on a case. It was the middle of the afternoon and there was something about Elena's behavior that worried him. She seemed so distant and as much as Kephart tried, she couldn't keep focused. Elliot knew that she needed to talk, so he decided that he would make it a point to focus on her that night.

He was lost in his thoughts when Olivia strolled into the precinct. She just seemed a little more beautiful than usual in his mind. There was something in her eyes that seemed raw and natural. Elliot decided to step up and check on his partner. "Liv?" 

She looked up with glassy eyes and he quickly took her hand. He led her to the cribs and he closed the door. Turning on a light, he saw the brokenness in her features. "What happened?" he asked.

"Simon wrote me from prison. He's never going to leave my life, is he El?" 

Elliot's heart broke for the woman he loved as he pulled her into his arms. He had turned off the harsh light from the cribs and moved her to one of the cots while holding her as she cried. 

Elena had been staring at the same piece of paperwork for about ten minutes. She felt her eyes grow heavy and JesseÕs voice took her from her thoughts. 

"Go to the cribs. I can cover you for now." 

"Jesse, Im not tired. I just need to finish these closed cases." 

"What word are you on?" he asked in a mocking tone.

"Five," she said with a surrendering smile. She lifted her hands in defeat and breathed, "You win, Kephart. But you are walking Zac tonight." 

"Damn!" he groaned. 

She laughed and started making her way up to the cribs. When she opened the door, she saw as Elliot kissed Benson's hair and soothed her from her tears. Her heart broke when she realized this is where he belong. There was a small part in her soul that made her want to believe that he could love her. But his heart belonged to Olivia Benson. Her heart belonged to no one.

Elliot saw Elena in the doorway and tensed for a moment. Olivia didn't notice his tension, but only held to him tighter. In the contrast of the light, Elena looked like an angel. An angel with broken eyes. "El..." 

"Im sorry," Elena said quickly. "Im just going to go." 

"Wait," he said, but not fast enough. Elena was out the door. 

Elliot was about to get up and follow her when Olivia tightened her hold. "Don't leave me, Elliot." 

He heard her plea and his heart broke for her. "Never," he whispered. "I won't leave you, Liv." 

Jesse was working on some paperwork when he felt his exhaustion getting the best of him. He moved out of the rolling chair and ventured to the coffee pot. Everyone usually complained on JohnÕs coffee making skills, but he didn't seem to mind. Coffee was bad for him, but it got him through the day. 

As he was pouring his cup of coffee, a pair of familiar arms wrapped around his waist. "Hello, stranger," the mystery woman whispered in his ear.  
He stiffened, turned and was surprised to meet the light brown eyes of Elena's younger sister, Jessica. "Oh my God, California baby!" he yelped. He pulled her into a hug and she laughed into his chest. 

"How are you, babe?" she asked staring at her crush of seventeen years. When her sister brought him home when she was little, she wanted to marry him. Now she was looking into the rich brown eyes of a man. She smirked as she traced his side burns with her fingertips and commented, "Couldn't get rid of these babies, huh?" 

He laughed and enjoyed feeling her close to him. "What can I say? They are apart of me." 

She laughed and kissed his cheek softly. He grew curious and said, "What are you doing here in New York? Sac State treating you okay?" 

Jessica flashed him a bright smile and said, "Yeah, but Im on break. The last thing I wanted to do was go to LA, so why not New York?" 

Jesse laughed and said, "You are by far the strangest individual that I have ever met." 

"That is odd since you live with my sister," Jessica said with a smile. 

"Jessica?" came a familiar voice behind her. 

"Speak of the devil," Jessica said pulling her big sister in a hug. When Jessica looked into her sister's eyes, she was saddened to find that they were green. They would change when her sister was insanely passionate or if she was hurting. "El..." 

"How are you?" Elena asked quickly.

Jesse caught the sudden change in tone and looked into her eyes. He, too, knew of his best friend's ability to change the color of her eyes. "Elena..." 

"Don want to see us," she said quickly. She looked to her sister and smiled. "I'll be back, okay?" 

Jessica nodded and checked out Jesse's butt as Elena and he walked into their captain's office. 

Elena walked into the office with determination in her eyes. "You wanted to see us?" she asked. 

Don looked up at two of his beat cops and immediately commanded them for a new case. "We have a new need for an undercover move. There has been recent movement in the Irish Mafia and now there has been an appearance of a raped and castrated male." 

Montero and Kephart nodded in silent acknowledgment.

"I will be placing you both undercover as investors in the bar. You two can get us a hit on which member killed and tortured this hit man. If you can do this, you have the experience required for detectives second grade." 

Jesse's head shot up in appreciation. Elena was still accepting this transition. Jesse decided to speak, "When do we start?" 

"As soon as be get permission from IAB." 

"Sir, there may be a slight problem for me," Elena spoke.

"What?" 

"My sister has come to town, but I should be ready and able by next week." 

"That should be fine. The legalities will be finalized by then. But I will send in Kephart earlier." 

"I don't want him without support," Elena argued.

"That isn't your call," Kephart said cooly. 

Elena sat stunned at his aloof tone. He seemed to be closing himself away from her. She swallowed and looked at his commanding officer for assistance. 

"You won't be alone, Kephart." Cragen stood up and opened the precinct door. "Stabler! My office!" 

Elena's eyes widened and Jesse grew more angry. Elliot strolled into the office and stared at the two officers with concerned and worried eyes.

"Elliot, Montero and Kephart will be undercover starting when IAB provides approval. I need you and Benson to explain the process and effective ways to infiltrate." 

Elliot looked at Elena who was effectively avoiding his gaze. "Cap--" 

"Its an order, Stabler. Get to work." 

Elena and Jesse walked out of the office and Elena tried to reach Jesse, but he effectively rushed away. Jessica saw the tension and hurt in JesseÕs face and stepped in front of his path. "Jessica--" 

"You need a break," she whispered looking over his shoulder to meet her sister's angered gaze. 

Jesse looked down on the brown eyed lady and admired the way she halted his movements. He took the opportunity to appreciate her beauty and strength. He surrendered with a nod and turned to get his jacket. Elena moved to his side and tried to speak when he effectively cut her off. "Later," was all he spoke. His rich brown eyes were on fire and his jaw was firm. 

Elena nodded and looked to her sister who only mouthed _We will talk_ as they walked out the door. 

Elena sat in her chair with her head between her knees as she tried to end a wave of nausea. She felt a strong hand rub her back and immediately tensed. "Leave me alone, Elliot," she whispered harshly.

"It isn't Elliot," Cragen said slowly. 


	4. Chapter 4

"Captain?" 

"Elena, why would you need to talk to Stabler right now?" Don said crossing his arms.

"Captain, Im kind of going through some family stuff and I don't want to talk about the undercover situation with Stabler right now if that is okay?" Elena said making up the quickest amount of bull shit as possible.

Don nodded and said, "Why don't you take the rest of the day off and go for a run with Zac. You don't look that healthy."

 "You trying to tell me something?" Elena said with a smirk as she reached for her coat. She felt her world begin to spin and a wave of nausea consume her. She gripped to the chair tightly and stood waiting for the nausea to cease.

"Montero, you okay?" Cragen said observing his officer's behavior.

Elena shook it off and looked at her commanding officer with strength. "I will see you tomorrow." 

Don sighed and watched another stubborn young officer leave his precinct.

Jesse and Jessica sat in the apartment and Jessica observed his movements. His senses were clouded and his heart was in a continuous debate within himself. There was so much anger and, to her surprise, hurt in his eyes. "Jesse," she whispered. "Just talk to me." 

"It gets too much sometimes," Jesse said looking into his beer.

"What do you mean?" she asked, moving closer to him.

"I just," he sighed and looked up at her. "It gets lonely after a while. Sure Elena is here and is my best friend, but she isn't mine. I don't have someone to hold at night and bare my soul to. I don't have the pleasure of looking into someone's eyes and finding a home within them. That fact alone is painful." 

Jessica sat shocked. How could he not see that she wanted him? That there was someone for him? Instead of admitting her feelings, she moved beside him and held him in her arms. He tensed, but quickly relaxed as she rubbed circles on his back. She whispered soothing words in his ear and his arms encircled her waist. "You don't have to be alone tonight," she whispered in a tone that was barely audible. 

Jesse moved his head slightly and stared into her rich brown eyes. For a moment he felt guilty for what he was about to do, knowing that his heart was her sister's, but Jessica didn't need to know. And he was indeed attracted to Jessica Montero. She was kind, lively and incredibly beautiful. "Jessica..." 

"Shh," she whispered as she tentatively lowered her lips to his. She watched as his rich brown eyes closed and he gripped her closer. His mouth surrendered to her softness and her arms encircled his neck as her fingers ran through his buzzed hair. 

Jesse was thankful for the touch of a woman. Jessica was no longer the younger sister that followed him and Elena around the central coast and flirted with every boy in site. No, she was grown and loving. As her tongue massaged his, he groaned and placed her on his lap so her legs locked around his waist. Jessica moved her hands down his chest and made her way to unbutton his shirt. He lifted her from the couch and carried her to his room to fulfill an overwhelming ache in his heart.

Elena had been running through Central Park with Zac for over an hour. It was when she went running that she could think about her life and her heart and its constant tears and bleeds. Elliot was hurting her... no, not only that. She was hurting herself. She was in love with a man who would never come to the terms of loving her in return. She entered this knowing she was a replacement, but the pain was eating at her soul. As she was running, she saw a family playing by the trees. The husband held his wife and a little girl ran to them and they held her close. That is all she ever wanted. A husband. A child. A family to call her own. She felt tears spring into her eyes and she continued to run with Zac.

It was when she was beginning to head to her apartment when her cell phone dragged her from her thoughts. "Montero," she answered.

"Hey," his voice came from over the line. "Can you come by?" 

"Tonight isn't a good night, Elliot," she whispered.

"Please," he pleaded from the other line.

The stop light signal allowed for her and Zac to cross and she said in an all knowing tone, "Tough case?" 

His lack of reply confirmed her thoughts.

"Give me an hour. I need to drop Zac off at the apartment and change. I just finished a run." 

"Wear your running clothes. You'll be doing more cardio anyway." 

"Elliot..." 

"Just come over." 

She nodded and closed the phone. When she arrived at her apartment, she quickly entered the apartment. When she came in, she saw Jesse's shirt scattered on the ground. Elena smirked and felt a twinge of, surprisingly, jealousy when she heard her sister moan from his bedroom. Instead of dwelling in these feelings, she remembered Elliot's phone call and lead Zac to the balcony to rest for the evening. 

Olivia sat on her couch in sadness and soaked in the loneliness that her life came to be. She knew she wanted to call Elliot, but wondered if he was off with Elena. Seeing him kiss her six months ago put a new knife into her heart. She had loved him for so long and she was ready to turn to him, he was kissing someone else. Someone younger. 

It was then that her phone rang. She smiled when she watched his name run across the screen and she answered it saying, "What are you doing?" 

"Sitting on the couch watching a baseball game." 

"Really? Which one?" 

"Does it matter?" Elliot whispered gruffly.

Olivia smiled and whispered, "No, I guess it doesn't." She loved the aspect of availability of silence in their relationship. The silence was comforting, but the companionship was the warm blanket that held them together. "What are you doing now?" 

"Im staring out my window. What are you going to do tonight?" 

"Im going to meet Casey for a drink, I think. She needs some girl time. What about you?" 

"I don't know. Im tired, Olivia. Im just... Im just tired." 

Olivia nodded. "Im tired of being alone," she said looking out the window. 

"You don't need to be," he whispered. "Olivi-- Liv, Im sorry. I gotta go. Have a fun time getting drinks with Novak, okay?" 

"Okay Elliot. Goodnight." They hung up and Olivia stared and silently prayed that one day she would find the courage to tell that man that she loved him.

Elliot closed his phone and left it on his bedside table and moved to his front door. He smiled and opened the door to see Elena in a pair of running pants and a zipped up sweatshirt. "Come in," he whispered.

She nodded and moved inside. When he closed the door, he found himself pressed against the door and between her thighs as he began to play with her mouth. He had wanted to talk to her and try to read her, but her lips were hypnotizing. 

Though her mouth was tempting and exciting, his heart belonged to Olivia. He hoped that she wouldn't find someone tonight in the bar when she met up with Casey. He hoped there wouldn't be another man he envied because he got to ride the woman he loved. That anger launched him into action as he swept Elena off her feet and into his arms.

Elena came with a purpose. She knew she needed to be honest with him tonight and reveal her heart to him. She only prayed that rejection didn't follow suit. "El.." 

"Shh..." he whispered. "Let's just feel and get lost tonight." 

Elena gave in as his hot mouth fed off her neck. She lost control when his large hands splayed over her tight stomach and his fingers journeyed to her waist band. She was in heaven when both of their clothes had been ripped savagely off their bodies and blood, sweat and saliva was exchanged in the sheets. 

He was positioned above her and was ready to plunge when she hooked their legs and flipped them over so she was above him. She slid down onto him roughly and he groaned in pleasure. Her pleasure was shown with the sweat above her brow and her loud moans. "El.." she cried as she rode him with increasing intensity.

He gripped her hips and watched her face. For a moment he felt guilt when he opened his eyes and saw Olivia bouncing above him. He knew it was his mind playing with him, but he was released from this image when Elena's moans became more intense. 

They both came rough and passionately. She couldn't control her scream and Elliot touched her softly. Exhaustion settled over them both as they found a comfortable position to lie together. 

Elena studied the man she loved closely. When he was about to drift to sleep, she found his transition in his facial features to be quite fascinating. She kissed his lips softly and whispered against him, "I love you, Elliot." 

He smiled and whispered before drifting to a land of sleep, "I love you, Olivia." 

Her heart was shattered. It was rejection at its finest. What hurt the most was that he would never know of his slip. Instead of breaking in front of him, she quickly slid away from his grasp and put on her clothes. She found a piece of paper and left him a note saying she couldn't handle their situation anymore. She left it beside his side table and allowed silent tears to fall. She looked back on him one last time before leaving his apartment and admired the beautiful man he was. He was perfect... except he didn't love her. 

Her eyes returned to the note and she knew she had to leave. Being second place hurt too much. "Goodbye, Elliot," she whispered as another painful tear fell from her eyes. She left his apartment with no intention of returning. 

Elena got into her car and lost herself. She cried for her pathetic life. There was no one to call her own and no one to love her. The rain hitting the windows was no longer welcoming, but a disgusting reminder of how her heart continued to drift away. 

She started the engine and ventured to her apartment. She reached for her phone and pressed number 1 on her phone... Jesse.

Jesse laid awake staring up at the ceiling as Jessica pressed kisses along his tan chest. He was content with her touch and played with her brown hair. He was about to kiss her when his phone rang. He was groaning in protest when Jessica pressed a quick kiss to his lips and smiled. "Answer the phone. It could be Cragen." 

He smiled at her kind nature and flipped open the phone answering, "Kephart." 

"Jess..." 

"Elena? Why are you crying?" Jesse asked concerned. Jessica looked into his eyes as she was changing back into her clothes.

"Jesse, I made the worst mistake. I just... It hurts so much." Her focus was off and she didn't notice the yellow light change to the halting red.

"Elena, stay calm and I'll come get you. Where are you?" 

"Jesse... NO!" Elena swerved a large semi truck came and barreled at her from the driver's side. Darkness consumed her instantly.

"Elena? Elena, what happened? Are you there?" Jesse asked in a panicked tone. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry it has been a while. The site was being a butt when this update was finished and once the site was working, I had a bunch of school work! Arg!! luckily i had a mini day today and could post this for you guys. Just let me know what you think! This goes out for Jess, Kinsey, Rach, Amanda and Essy for sticking with me! Much love to all of you and all of you who keep reading. :-D**

Olivia straddled his naked torso as she left scorching wet kisses along his neck and chest. "Liv," he groaned as his hands found a comfort on her tight tan waist. 

"I love you, Elliot," she whispered as she came down on his shaft.

He smiled and they moved together in the bed. In a playful fashion, he moved them to a sitting position. He was lost in a passion filled haze, but when he opened his eyes, he saw Elena in the doorway with a suitcase in her hand. Her ash blonde hair was straightened and her eyes were a bright green, as if they had been pieces of broken emeralds that were filled with a salty water to allow them to be afloat. He made no motion to stop making love to Olivia, but tried to read Elena's plump lips as she spoke to him. 

"Im close, El," Olivia said riding him hard.

"Goodbye, Elliot," Elena repeated slowly over and over again, silent tears falling from her eyes.

"Wait for me," Elliot whispered in Olivia's ear as he tried to reach Elena. A gun shot rang out through his room and Elliot blinked. Olivia looked blankly in his eyes as blood pooled from her stomach. "NO!" he screamed.

"Elliot!" Elena said softly as he saw her blood also escape from an open wound.

He watched as she fell to the ground but he only prayed for Olivia to come back to life. 

** Ring! Ring!**

Elliot sat up in bed, sweat coating his muscular face and body, looking around his surroundings and found himself naked and alone. He didn't see the piece of paper fly and descend to under his bed. Elliot grabbed his cell phone and sighed in relief when Olivia's nick name, LIV, made its way across the screen. He opened the phone and breathed deeply. "Liv?" 

"El, you okay?" her voice said filled with concern.

He took a few deep breaths and looked around his room and was slightly disappointed to find no trace of Elena. He looked at the end of the bed where, in his nightmare, was filled with such blood. He sighed and spoke to Olivia in a confused tone. "I had a nightmare. But I am going to be okay... I think. Are you okay?" 

She laughed and said, "Im fine, but Cragen woke me up. We are on a case. Meet me at General, okay? Im going to take a quick shower."

He laughed and moved his naked body from the warmth of his side of the bed to the chill of the other. "Okay, I will see you shortly. Be careful, Liv." 

"Always am," she smiled as she shut her phone closed. 

Elliot was surprised to find such a chill in his bed. It felt as if he had been alone all night. The sheets proved otherwise, but the loneliness haunted him. He didn't know why Elena didn't stay last night like he asked her to. Maybe he would catch her at the crime scene and find a way to talk to her. Yeah... thats the plan, he thought to himself. 

Jesse paced the hospital waiting area after sitting for eight hours without word from any doctors or nurses. He had been told that his friend was in bad shape. The truck driver was going to be fine. He only had a few cuts and a bruise on his wrist. Elena was laying in surgery and he was called in by their superior, Detective Tutuola, that Elena was heading to the hospital. The only reason Fin knew anything about this incident at all is because he and his girlfriend, Karen, were out for dessert when they saw the incident occur. Jesse and Jessica rushed to the hospital as they anxiously waited for answers. 

"Damn it! We've been waiting for hours," Jesse said as his anger was becoming the best of him.

"Jesse, please sit down. They will tell us everything once Elena is okay," Jessica said as she worried for her sister. 

"No, I need answers." Jesse stood up and confronted a nurse leaving the operation corridors. "Excuse me, how is Elena Montero?" 

"And you are?" the nurse asked suspiciously.

"Im her sister," Jessica chimed in quickly as she stood by Jesse. 

"I can't say too much right now, but a doctor will be out to talk to you shortly." 

"Shortly?" Jesse spat. "That is what they told us two hours ago!" 

"Im sorry, Sir," the nurse said looking into the muscular man's brown eyes. "News on your girlfriend will be given shortly." 

"I need to know if she is going to be okay," Jesse said impatiently. He turned away and paced toward the exit doors. 

Jessica noticed his lack of correction and everything began to fall into place. She stood dumbfounded at her own ridiculous thoughts and feelings. The reason Jesse didn't look at other women or didn't see when others were checking him out wasn't because he couldn't see it. It was because his eyes and heart belonged to another... her sister. Jessica felt like a fool, but knew that her sister couldn't have anyone better than Jesse Kephart. The sounds of the hospital and the touch of the older nurse brought her back to reality. Jessica looked at the older nurse with tear glazed eyes and said hoarsely, "Thank you for your kindness." 

The nurse saw the worry and heartbreak in the young woman's eyes and squeezed her hand as a sign of human connection and strength. "It will be okay, honey," the woman whispered.

Jessica allowed two tears to fall and she removed herself from the situation. She was on autopilot and could no longer feel until she received news on her sister's condition. 

Jesse was pacing and his anger turned to rage as he watched Detective Elliot Stabler walk through the emergency room doors with his strength and confidence. He didn't see the heartache and the pain he inflicted on his best friend... the hidden love of his life. He moved through the doors and stormed up to the older detective and growled, "You son of a bitch!" He punched the defenseless detective and Elliot fell to the ground.

"Jesse, No!" Jessica called out running to his side. 

"You couldn't treat her right. She cared about you! She let you use her and you couldn't love her the way she needed. How could you? How could you hurt her so badly that she ended up here?" 

Jesse kicked at his ribs but Elliot rolled away before he could make contact. Elliot stood and found his bearings as he stared at the angry cop. Elliot tasted the blood that escaped his lip and he stood at him angry. "What the hell is your problem? Who got hurt?" 

"Like you don't know!" Jesse said ready to throw the next punch. Jessica moved in front of Jesse as he swung and he eyes grew immensely when he hit her instead of the detective. "Jessica!" he said as he moved beside her.

"Jesse, stop! None of this is helping her," she growled as she turned away from his eyes. 

"Who got hurt?" Elliot said looking at Jesse for answers. 

Olivia walked into the emergency room and saw Elliot bleeding. "El..." 

Just then, a surgeon entered the waiting room and said, "Who is here for Officer Elena Montero?" 

Elliot froze. _Elena Montero._ "Oh God," he whispered as his palms began to sweat. Images of her bleeding and falling reappeared into his mind and he saw Olivia by his side. She held to his hand as a symbol of strength for him as he stood before the surgeon. 

Jesse and Jessica moved before the doctor and said, "We are here for her. How is she?" 

The doctor sighed and said sadly, "May you please sit down." 

Everyone's hearts beat rapidly as they moved to listen to the doctor. 

"Ms. Montero has suffered many internal injuries. Two of her ribs have punctured her left lung and it has made it hard for her to breathe. Fortunately, we have been able to repair most of her damages but we have needed to remove a rib from the right side." 

Elliot stiffened and couldn't help but wonder how she got into this condition. "Doctor, what happened to have her in this condition?" 

"Officer Montero was in a car collision that hit her vehicle on the driver's side. According to the fact sheet," he stood back and looked at the form, "...Detective Tutuola made the call for the ambulance." 

He sighed and Jesse spoke up. "Doctor, you said that you were able to repair most of her injuries. What aren't you telling us?" 

The doctor sighed and said, "We were unfortunately unable to save the fetus." 

Elliot's heart broke. He stumbled and spoke in a stutter, "Ff--eetus? What do you mean you couldn't save the fetus? What fetus?" 

"According to the fetus's form, Ms. Montero was eight weeks along. Im sorry. You can see her shortly." The doctor then turned and walked away. 

Jesse was heartbroken for his best friend. Instead of investing his time on his hurt, he turned to the detective by his side in anger. "This is your fault! What did you say to her? What made her get in that car and almost die?" 

"I don't know?" Elliot said without emotion. He was lost in a world of confusion and guilt. "I don't know why she left and I don't know how she lost our baby." 

_ Our baby. _Those words stung Jesse to his core. "You son of a..." "Jesse, go home," Jessica said stepping before the two officers once again.

"Jess..." 

"You need to change your clothes and feed Zac. Elena needs us to be strong for her now. Go. I will call you if her condition changes." She touched his arm in a soothing fashion and his body immediately relaxed. 

He looked into her eyes and surrendered. He looked at the detective from over her shoulder and said in all seriousness, "You are to be gone before I return." 

Elliot nodded and Jesse left the hospital with a crushed heart. He looked at Jessica and began to speak, "Thank---" 

"Don't thank me, Detective Stabler. My sister hasn't been treated well by men, and now I need to know what happened to her heart before I leave in three days. It may be less if Jesse can stay with her." She stopped and took a breath. She looked up and met the hypnotizing eyes of Elliot Stabler, but had control. "Elliot. If you cared for my sister at all, please let her let you go. She can have a better life, but she needs to see it." 

Elliot nodded and Jessica moved to the nurses station for a way to see her sister. He sighed and put his head in his hands. _My baby is dead and I didn't even know..._ It wasn't until he felt Olivia's touch that he broke. He held her close and cried of guilt and anger. Anger for the lack of knowledge and his ignorance. He had to speak to Elena.

He needed to know if she knew.

And he wanted to let her go. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry this has taken me forever to update, but I have been incredibly busy! Forgive me with leaving you with such a spot last time and enjoy the update! This is for AGHS baseball and an entertaining last game of the season! Go Eagles!**

Elliot stood in the hospital doorway watching as Elena fought with the medication. She was waking up and he sighed in relief as she opened her golden green eyes to meet upon his face. Surprised by his appearance, she stiffened and whispered hoarsely, "What happened?" 

Elliot sighed and stepped closer to her. "You were in a collision last night. A semi ran a red and hit you. That was last night." Elliot had now taken a seat beside her and tried to meet her eyes. "Elena, why didn't you stay with me last night? I asked you to." 

Elena felt the memories returning to her and his call for Olivia. She closed her eyes and turned away from him trying to escape from this moment. "It doesn't matter now, Elliot," she whispered. Elena suddenly felt a surge of emptiness inside her and she placed her hands on her lower abdomen. Elliot knew that she was searching herself for some form of meaning and he couldn't look into her eyes. Elena noticed his demeanor and spoke in a shaky but secure tone. "Elliot, what happened to me?" 

"I told you," he whispered. "You were in an accident..." 

"No, that isn't what I want and you know it." Her tone was foreign to him and he saw her confusion and the pain in their horizon. "What happened..." 

"You were pregnant." 

There was silence as she let the fact of her pregnancy consume her. There was a jolt of excited energy that surged through her body but then the word _were_ stung her soul. "You said were," she whispered hoarsely.

"The impact of the accident... you were about eight weeks along." He felt the tears spring into his eyes but he didn't want to let her see that. "Elena, Im sorry--" 

"Where is Jesse?" she asked turning away.

"Elena, I want to help you," he whispered touching her hand.

"Please don't," she whispered, her voice full of tears. 

He swallowed back his emotion as he watched his lover fight back tears. He moved and sat on her bed, pleased that she didn't ask him to leave. She bit her lip, saddened to find a scab, and a tear fell down her cheek. "I wanted my baby," she whispered sadly.

He nodded and touched her cheek, removing her tear and found her vulnerability intriguing but heartbreaking. "Im so sorry," he whispered. 

Her defenses were up and she didn't want Elliot to see her this broken. She moved her hand and removed his from the side of her face. "You need to go," she whispered turning away from him. 

"Elena..." 

"Elliot, you need to leave. I can't be with you anymore. Not like this. It hurts too much." 

Elliot nodded and moved his hand across a gash above her brow. "I want to help you. The way you helped me. You are so good. Im sorry." 

"Letting me go will be the best thing you can do, Elliot." Elena turned away from him, rolling herself into a fetal position and stared out into the window.

Though Elliot knew letting her go was the only way either of them could move on, he was angered by her withdrawal. "Why? Why do I have to leave you when I want to help you?" 

"Because you don't love me," she whispered angrily. "You never have. I can't... I can't be second place anymore." 

Elliot swallowed his urge for rebuttal due to his lover's tears. He nodded and kissed her forehead, unconsciously touching her stomach. "Im sorry, Elena." He got up off the bed and moved out the door only hearing her sobs as he walked down the lonely hall.

The pain got to her soul. It wasn't ceasing and she felt her heart shatter. She had a feeling that something was different, but didn't develop the possibility of a baby. She continued to rub her empty womb as sobs shook through her. She finally did what was best for her, by letting Elliot go, but she was alone. She was alone physically and emotionally.

Suddenly, a hand grasped her shoulder and she gripped it with all her strength. She turned and buried her face into the man's chest and cried out, "Jesse, it hurts so much!" 

Jesse held his best friend close as she descended to her breaking point. He knew this would be her darkest hour and he was thankful she wanted him there. "Shh. Baby, it will be okay. It will be okay." 

Elliot made his way down the hall and was relieved to find Olivia waiting for him. She looked up and saw his broken demeanor and immediately moved to his side. He pulled her close and cried silently into her hair as he grieved for the loss of his child. "Pregnant, Liv," was all that he kept repeating in her hair. 

"Let me get you out of here," she whispered soothing his back with small soothing circles. Olivia gripped his hand and led him to his car. Lucky for her, she didn't have to argue with him to drive. She led them to his apartment as she mentally prepared her ways to help him. She watched the different emotions that passed over her partner's face. She gripped his hand as they sat in the car waiting for him to make the motion to leave the vehicle.

After what felt like hours, he spoke. "My baby is gone, Olivia." 

She nodded and rubbed over his knuckles with her thumb. "I know, El. Im sorry." 

"I didn't treat her right." 

"What do you mean?" 

"She was never the one I wanted. I didn't see she was breaking until a few nights ago. One night... Elena's eyes lost their spark. She didn't ever want me to see her cry, but I would hear her outside the bedroom door. She's so strong. So independent. I never... I never even..." 

"Never what, El?" Olivia whispered moving closer to him.

Elliot turned his body so he could look at Olivia directly. He sighed and looked into her brown eyes and whispered, "I couldn't ever let myself fall for her because my heart belongs to someone else." 

Olivia searched his eyes and saw the love reflected toward her. She couldn't make a move... not tonight. She nodded in understanding and kissed his rough hand. "Let's go upstairs. We need rest before Cragen calls us in tomorrow." 

Elliot nodded and squeezed Olivia's hand for strength as they ventured for continuance.

Jessica returned to her sister's hospital room, relieved to see Jesse with her as she slept. She moved beside his focused form and touched his shoulder softly. His brown eyes moved from her sister to her and he gave her a tired smile. "Hey," he whispered.

"When did she go down?" Jessica asked. 

"About ten minutes ago." Jesse turned back to Elena and touch her face along her hairline. "Jess, why does she hurt so much? She is too good, you know?" 

Jessica stared down at her broken sister and the man who loved her and smiled sadly at the scene before her. She knew she would be leaving her sister with the most capable care and she nodded at his statement. She leaned down and kissed her older sister's forehead and looked back at her brown eyed crush with a sad smile. "I need to handle some business outside. Can you stay for a few moments and then you can get some dinner?" 

Jesse watched the combination of relief and pain of his friend's features and was saddened to see tears in her brown eyes. He was about to question it, but simply nodded at her request once Elena began to stir. 

Jessica moved outside the hospital room to the hall and dialed the simple numbers, 4-1-1, in her phone. "This is Verizon 4-1-1 connect, which city please?" 

"New York City," Jessica replied.

"Business?"

"Fly Home Travel Agency," Jessica said sadly.

"Thank you and we will direct your call," the operator said professionally.

The line connected to a kind woman and the woman spoke, "This is Amanda of Fly Home Travel Agency. How may I help you today?" 

"Yes, I would like a flight to LAX tomorrow afternoon please," Jessica whispered wiping tears from her eyes. 

What she didn't notice was the man behind her listening to her planning to exit their lives in New York City... 


	7. Chapter 7

**Surprise! Here is an update!! Hope you like. This is for HKitty9013 and MissFantabulous who always review!! You guys rock my socks!! Also to Kinsey and Jess for their ongoing support with 30! Haha. Hugs to all and enjoy the update! **

Jessica stood by the bed, packing the rest of her duffle with random thing she brought with her from Sacramento. As much as she wanted to stay and help her sister, she knew she needed to leave. There was no longer a point in staying around. It hurt too much.

Her flight was to leave at 4:30 that afternoon. It was 7:45 in the morning. She wiped away a defiant tear when she heard his voice behind her.

"Were you planning on saying goodbye?" Jesse said in a low tone.

Jessica stiffened and replied, "To Elena, yes." 

Jesse got angry and decided to push her, using the detective skills he had recently mastered. "What about me?" 

"You would have figured it out soon enough." 

"You didn't come to bed last night," he stated.

"Did you want me to?" Jessica said, gathering her sweater.

"Of course I did," he said, surprised by the hurt in her voice. "Why wouldn't I have wanted you with me?" 

"Because it isn't me you want and you and I both know it." Jessica turned around and chose not to react to his nearly nakedness. He stood clad in only a bath towel and a towel around his neck. His broad chest stood proudly and his brown eyes were filled with anger and confusion. Jessica looked down, no longer able to meet his gaze and spoke, "It is Elena. It always has been." 

"That isn't--" 

"Don't lie to me." Jessica lifted her hand to stop him and continued, "If you care about me at all, you can at least be honest with me." 

Jesse stepped toward her and studied the hurt in her eyes. To his surprise there was a shade of midnight blue that resided within her. "Eye changing is a Montero trait," he spoke touching her face softly. "Im sorry, Jessica." 

She looked up at him and whispered, "Im not. I have always loved you. It was my mistake to believe you felt the same." 

Jesse leaned his head down and captured her plump lips with his. He wanted to heal her of the hurt he mistakenly caused. Jessica wrapped her arms around his neck and savored the final taste of him. Unfortunately, things grew heated and Jesse pushed her down of the bed, his body hovering over hers. As his mouth traveled down the column of her neck and his hands journeyed to the hem of her sweater, Jessica's common sense told her she couldn't stay. Her heart wouldn't handle it. "No," she said placing a hand on his chest. 

"Jess..." 

"Please." She looked into his brown eyes that were filled with a growing pain and she shook her head. "Let me go." 

Jesse reluctantly rolled off of her and Jessica straightened her appearance. He watched as she packed the rest of her things. He swallowed and asked lowly, "Are you going to call when you reach California?" 

"I don't think that would be best. Elena can call me if she wants to update me on her condition. I know you will take care of her." 

"What if I want to talk to you?" he pushed.

"Please, don't. You got so angry at Elliot for using Elena. Please don't do that to me." 

"You are comparing me to that son of a bitch!" Jesse growled standing on his feet and stepping toward her. 

Jessica stood and looked him square in the eye. "When we had sex were you thinking about me?" 

"Excuse me?" he asked.

"Was it my touch you wanted? Can you honestly tell me that I was more than a whore to you the other night?" 

"How can you say that?" Jesse said hurt.

"Its the truth and you know it. I have never been the one you wanted. Accept it. Learn from it. Move on." 

Jessica began to turn away when he grabbed her. "No," he growled as he took her lips with his. She moaned both in pleasure and pain and she pushed him away. "Jessica, that night I needed the appreciation of a woman. You... You were..." 

"What?" she whispered wiping at her tears.

"You were amazing. You are going to make a man very happy one day." 

Jessica gave a broken smirk and stepped in front of her shirtless hero and place a final kiss on his mouth. "Im sorry for comparing you to Elliot. I was angry." 

He nodded and let her get her duffle. "My guess is that this is goodbye," he whispered.

She smiled sadly and said, "Yeah, until I receive an invitation to yours and my sister's wedding." 

His mouth dropped and she laughed touching his chest playfully. "Don't pretend to hide that you haven't thought of marrying her." 

He smirked and furrowed his brows and his thumb grazed over her the covered bruise around her cheek. "Im sorry about that," he whispered.

"No worries," she whispered looking into his rich brown eyes one last time. "Goodbye, Jesse. Tell her how you feel. Learn from this." 

He nodded and pressed a kiss on her forehead and released her. "Bye Cali Girl." 

She smiled sadly and exited the apartment, petting Zac before leaving this chapter of her life. Jesse only watched as the brown eyed beauty exited his life. 

That morning, Elliot woke with Olivia in his arms as they laid on the couch. Elliot played with her brown hair and she woke up to stare into his focused gaze. "Hi," she whispered. "How did you sleep?" 

"Better with you with me," he replied. 

Olivia smiled and kissed his chest while lifting herself off the couch. "Im going to call Cragen to say I will be late in. You get ready to go so you can give me a ride you my place." 

He nodded and made his way to his bedroom. When he entered, he was surprised to see his window opened and a light hitting a piece of paper with his name across it. He moved down, traced his name and read the painful letter.

_Elliot._

Im sorry. I can't do this anymore. It isn't you. Well... Yes it is. Elliot, I can't let you hurt me anymore. My heart keeps breaking. I can't love a man who doesn't love me. It is clear to me that you don't. Please, don't come after me. Let me go. We are good officers and I made the mistake of making us more than just sex. You and I... we are officers of the law. I choose to live out my personal life with the unrequited route of love. You don't have to. Please, tell Olivia how you feel. You deserve so much Elliot Stabler. Let her know.

My love,

Elena

Elliot sat dumbfounded on the edge of the bed, staring down at the letter and rubbing his thumb against the areas where her tears fell. Olivia found him in that position and tilted her head in confusion. "Elliot?" 

She moved beside him and took the letter from him. She sighed and stared at his broken form and tried to comfort him. "Oh Elliot." 

"I hurt her so much. I didn't mean to, but I did." 

"She made her own choices, Elliot. She chose to have a relationship with you. She invested her heart into you. That is choice. You were right, Elliot." 

"She is right though," he whispered. 

"What do you mean?" Olivia asked.

He turned and met her eyes. He touched her face and spoke evenly. "I do care about you, Olivia. More than I should. You... You are my constant. I have... I've fallen in love with you, Olivia." 

Olivia's eyes watered as the man of her dreams spoke the words she had longed for. "Oh, El," she whispered as she gathered him in her arms. "I love you, too. So much." 

Olivia pulled away to kiss him. It was like magic as their destiny appeared before them. Their touch was all that they ever needed. "Im sorry," Elliot whispered.

"For what?" Olivia said smiling. "I enjoyed that." 

He smiled and stared into her eyes and replied. "Im sorry I didn't tell you that sooner." 

She smiled and kissed him quickly while joining their hands. "We are together now. That is what matters." 

He smiled and kissed her once more, wanting to know that this was real. "What about Elena?" he asked.

"What about her?" Olivia said touching her partner's face.

"I want her to be happy. I want her to realize that she deserves to be loved." 

Olivia sighed and smiled at him. "I think Jesse Kephart will do a good job off that." 

Elliot smiled and rubbed his jaw. "I want to still be her friend." 

"And you will. Give it time." 

Elliot smiled and kissed Olivia deeply on the mouth, smiling when she moaned in pleasure. "I love you, Liv." 

"And I love you, El," she whispered.

**Okay, some fluff for you my darlings! Now review and love! Haha!! Hugs! **


	8. Chapter 8

His mouth pressed against the hollow of her neck and he pressed his large hand along her bulging stomach. She smiled into his thick neck and pressed a kiss to the tough skin. "Baby, stop," she whispered with a laugh as he began to tickle her by her hip bone. 

"What?" he asked playfully as his kissed down her body to her pregnant belly. "I love you, little one," he whispered to the baby as he pressed a kiss just beneath her belly button. He looked up into her golden green eyes and touched her face softly. "And I love you, Elena." 

She smiled and kissed his lips tenderly. "I love you too, Jesse." 

"Elena?" Jessica asked shaking her sister awake slightly. 

Elena's eyes shot open as she remembered her reality. She had finally ended things with Elliot and she lost their baby. She was lying in an uncomfortable hospital bed desperate for escape. She turned her head and saw her younger sister and smiled sadly. "Hey babe." 

Jessica moved over beside her and sat down. She gripped her sister's hand and looked into her eyes for a sense of peace and resolution. "How are you holding up?" 

Elena rolled her eyes and stared down into their joined hands. "I've been better," she whispered. "Jesse hasn't come yet this morning, so its been quiet." 

Jessica laughed instead of showing her sister her raw pain that would take time to mend. "He will be by. I have no doubt that he will be there for you always." 

Elena was puzzled by her sister's statement and looked up to see her sibling looking out the open hospital window. "What does that mean?" 

"Nothing," she whispered in reply. 

Elena noticed a slight bruising by her sister's eye and brought her hand to it slowly. "Sweetie, what happened?" she asked gently. 

"Don't ask," Jessica answered quickly. 

"Jess, is there something going on in Sacramento that I should know about?" she asked in cop tone. 

Jessica laughed out loud and turned back to her sister. "It wasn't anything, Elena. You know me. Im a walking talking disaster." 

"Why do you do that to yourself?" Elena said, saddened by her sister's broken view of herself. 

"Well, I learned from the best," she replied bitterly. 

"What the hell is your problem?" Elena said, sitting up on the bed as Jessica walked toward the window. "Don't you dare turn your back on me. There is something wrong with you and I want to know what it is. You wouldn't just come to New York for no reason. Tell me what the hell is wrong with you." 

"Its not like you fucking cared when we were kids, so don't act like you do now," Jessica said wringing her hands in anger. 

"Why would you say that?" Elena asked with tears in her eyes. 

"Its the truth! Mom and Dad always pushed you to whatever you wanted. They are angry at me and have threatened to cut me off financially and physically from their lives because I want to transfer to Cal Poly because I can't handle the criminal justice major at Sac State! The man that I have loved for years uses me for sex to stop thinking about you for a period of two hours and now you are here, broken and in the hospital and I have to fucking leave you because I can't be strong enough for you!" 

Elena sat in shock as she watched her sister crumble before her. In their family, there were never known for showing weakness in front of anyone and she realized that Jessica must have bottled her hurt to the extreme. "Jess..." 

"Im sorry, sweetie," Jessica said turning around and moving to her sister's side, pulling her into a hug. "Im sorry I snapped. I just... Things get too much, you know? And I worry about you. You and your heart. I know that losing this baby must be killing you." 

Elena nodded and whispered, "It hurts, but I'll make it through. I have a good support system here in New York. And I always have you." 

Jessica smiled and brushed a stray of blonde hair from her sister's face. She bit her bottom lip out of a nervous reaction and sat in silence. 

"Jessica, baby girl, when do you leave?" Elena whispered trying to read her sister. 

"Four thirty." 

"Why so early? I thought you had a few days," Elena said, her eyes wide. 

"You don't need me here." 

"You are my sister," she whispered, gripping her hand. "Jessica, why didn't you tell me you were having problems with mom and dad?" 

"Like I would want to admit my problems to you. And you seemed to have enough issues without having me tell you about it." 

"It seems that you are going to have a lot to work out and soon." 

"Regardless of mom and dad's decision, I am going to Cal Poly. A friend of mine has an apartment down there and I am going to find my way. I just... Im lonely, Elena." 

"Lonely?" 

"Elena, I need someone to love me. Not a sister or brother type love. Not out of sympathy or of a situational need. I want someone to love me. Neither of us seem to have luck in that department, sweetie." 

Elena laughed slightly and groaned when she felt a ripping pain in her abdomen and her ribs. Jessica apologized and smiled sadly at her sister. Before she could continue, Elena spoke. "Jess, you will find the one you are supposed to be with and you will be happy. The change with be good for you sweetie. If you need support, I can talk to mom and dad, okay?" 

Jessica nodded and kissed her sister's forehead quickly. She looked down and noticed Elena's eyes begin to droop. "Its time for me to go, babe." 

"Can you call me when you arrive in California?" Elena asked hopefully. 

"Why don't you call me when you want to talk to me. You need to rest." 

As Jessica stood to leave the hospital room, Elena remembered a section of her rant that bothered her. The man that I have loved for years uses me for sex to stop thinking about you... "Jessica." 

She turned around and looked into her big sister's eyes. She lifted her hand to stop her sister from speaking and said, "Don't push Jesse too far. He is a wonderful man that cares about you. Don't hurt him." 

"What about you?" Elena asked with tears filling her eyes. 

Jessica smiled sadly and replied, "I love you, Elena. Your happiness is what matters now. Don't push him away." She lifted her bag onto her shoulder and gave her sister one final smile. She blew her a kiss and waved goodbye. "I love you, sis." 

Elena nodded and let her sister walk out of her life for the time being. 

When Jessica moved to the elevator, her eyes filled with tears, she wasn't surprised to see Jesse on the other side of the doors. She lowered her head and made her way passed him, ignoring his questioning stare. 

"Jess," he whispered, holding the elevator doors open. 

She looked up and put on the best fake smile she could muster. "Take care of my sister." 

"Jess..." 

"Goodbye, Officer Kephart." 

He nodded and whispered, "Have a safe flight." He removed his hand and allowed the elevator doors to shut completely. 

As Olivia took a shower, Elliot stood outside on the balcony and made a quick phone call. "Captain, this is Stabler. I have a favor to ask you..."

Jesse came to the hospital with lilies in his hand and a concerned tone in his mind. He was worried about Elena and how she was handling the miscarriage. When he entered the room, he saw her looking out the window lost in thought. "El," he whispered, moving beside her. 

She turned to him and asked him harshly, "What did you do to my sister?"

**DUN DUN DUN! Want more? Gotta review! Love ya all! **


	9. Chapter 9

**Its back! Hope you like. FYI, there is smut at the end of the chapter, so if you aren't comfortable with a sex scene, just review. Haha. Love ya! **

Jesse stood startled as the daisies in his hand began to welt. "El..." 

"Don't you El me," Elena said, her fiery green eyes meeting his. She was hurting, worried and angry. Never a good combination for a Montero. "My sister just came to wish me good luck and good-bye. We may not be as close as we used to be, but I recognized the heartbreak in her eyes. Now I want to know what you did." 

"Please..." 

"If you are honest with me, I can forgive you and move on, but Jesse, I want the truth." 

Jesse sighed and placed the flowers across her stomach. He turned his head toward to window to gather his knowledge and just the right words to say. Jesse closed his eyes for a moment, and spoke. "Jess and I went for a cup of coffee. I was mad at Stabler and I needed a break. She wanted to see Zac because she hadn't met him yet. When we got to the apartment, I noticed you already took him for his run. However, I just couldn't shake my mood away. She began to rub my shoulders and before we knew it, we were in bed." 

Elena stared away surprised at the knives that plunged into her heart. Instead of letting them known, she whispered, "Why is she leaving?" 

"Well, you got hurt and I got territorial in the waiting room." 

She smirked and asked, "Territorial?" 

"I might of punched Stabler a time or two..." 

"You did what?" she squealed as she experience a stabbing pain in her lower abdomen. 

"Shh..." he said trying to calm her. "Well, she was somewhat upset and I chose to ignore it because..." 

"Because?" 

"Because I was worried about you." He sighed and turned away from her because he wasn't ready to say the words. "I didn't think anything of it. That was until..." 

"Until?" 

"I was leaving to change clothes when I heard her on the phone by the elevators. She was scheduling a flight to leave for Sacramento. I didn't want her to know that I knew she was leaving, so I didn't question her when she didn't join me in bed last night. However, after my shower, I watched her for a while as she packed. With you Montero women, I can only see you at your weakest when you think you are alone. We talked when I let myself be known and I told her that she would be fine in California. I saw her just before I came in. Said my goodbyes and now I am here." 

There was silence for a while. They both needed to grasp their new reality. Elena thought back on what her sister told her and knew that Jesse wasn't opening up completely. Now was her chance to find the truth. "Jesse.." 

"Im sorry," he repeated. "I am sorry that I hurt Jessica. I didn't... I didn't..." 

"What?" she questioned. 

"I couldn't think about her and what she needed. She didn't let me in on anything. If I had known she was interested in something long term, I would have not started anything. I swear I didn't mean to hurt her." 

Elena nodded and took this moment to push him. "Why would you have pushed her away?" 

Damn he thought to himself. He asked for it this time. "Well... I..." 

"Jesse Kephart, why would you have said no?" 

"My heart belongs to someone else," he whispered. 

Elena swallowed and found her heart fluttering. She dared to push it further and covered his strong hand with hers. "Who?" she released in a soft breath. 

His rich brown eyes met hers and he brought his other hand to touch her face. His thumb brushed over a set of stitches underneath her eye and he looked down at her plump lips. He moved closer and lowered his mouth to hers. He groaned at the sensation of their kiss and pulled her face closer. Though he wanted to consume her, he ended their kiss and whispered, "You. You have my heart." 

She sighed and brought her to him again, feeling at peace. His mouth worked magic on her soul and his tongue invaded her mouth. She was at home and learned to embrace these feelings she encountered. Though fear still struck her, she knew that he could pave their way to happiness and, for her, love. 

Olivia stretched as she looked out into the city. Still in a bathrobe, she stared off into the city thinking about what has occurred in the past twenty-four hours. Elliot lost a child, they found love and now he was taking a shower while she was in his bathrobe in the early morning. In complete bliss, she sighed as she felt his strong arms wrap around her waist and his lips upon her neck. She moaned and smiled when she felt in smile in his kiss. 

"What are you thinking about?" he whispered by her ear. 

"You, me, us," she whispered taking a sip of her tea. It surprised her to find tea in her new boyfriend's kitchen cabinet, but many of the things he did surprised her. She turned and placed the warm cup on the side table and stole his mouth in a kiss. She loved to feel him wet and warm. Water droplets still stained his skin and she pulled him close to her. His body melded to hers. "I love you, El," she whispered. 

He pulled back and kissed her in a quick and playful fashion on her lips. "I love you more," he whispered as he teased the knot in the robe. 

She laughed and nibbled his neck. "Are you trying to seduce me?" Olivia asked licking devilishly. 

He groaned and released her of her robe to have her naked form before him. "Are you trying to seduce me, woman?" he groaned as she linked their hands. 

She straddled his waist and groaned when she felt his erection pressing against her thighs. "Yes," she whispered in a heated voice. "I am seducing you, Elliot Stabler." She rubbed her heat over him and when his grip tightened, she smirked. "Make love to me." Olivia stared into his eyes, watching his heart through them and kissed him deeply. She moaned and whispered, "Fuck me senseless!" 

He growled and threw her naked form on the bed, attacking her neck with his mouth. Her naked body writhed beneath him as his burning hands claimed her skin. He wanted to be crazed and playful and passionate at the same time. Elliot laid her diagonal to the bed's shape and lifted her hands above her head. He kissed down her her body and sang into her skin, "Pour some sugar on me." She laughed and when he got to her lips he yelled, "Oh, in the name of love!" 

He straddled her body and ground into her core, teasing her heat and growled into her breast, "Come on and fire me up!" 

Olivia moaned wanting more of his power and she wanted to succumb to hysteria. "More!" she screamed as she rocked the bed and thrust her body into him. 

Elliot gave a satisfied moan and analyzed her womanhood. He spread her legs apart and inhaled her heat. Teasing her with intensity, he whispered on her, "Pour your sugar on me." He then feasted on her and she found herself shattering within minutes. 

She had no defenses and she screamed in sheer delight when his tongue penetrated further. "Elliot! Shit... God... Oh... El..." she screamed as her muscles uncontrollably shook beneath him. 

He smirked as he finished taking her in and kissed up her torso. He groaned as he said, "Im hot, sticky sweet." When he reached her mouth, he kissed her long and deep, preparing her body for what was going to happen next. 

She groaned and whispered roughly, "Hard n' fast, Stabler. Make me scream again." 

With this, he thrust into her and her nails dug into his muscular flesh. Each raced to the finish line with the manipulation of control, sweat and sex. However, it was Olivia who once again lost control with Elliot quickly behind her. They didn't want their encounter to end, but exhaustion took hold. 

When Elliot removed himself from within her, she groaned from missing their connection. He smirked and brought her sweaty body closer to him. "I love you, Liv," he whispered as sleep consumed him. 

She stared and studied his sleeping face as he slept. Before she gave into unconsciousness herself, she kissed his velvet lips and smiled. "I love you more." 

** Okay, Im thinking there is going to be 2 chapters left. Let me know what you think:-) Hope you guys liked... **


End file.
